Heart Broken Week (Pt. 1)

This is likely part 1 of something….but we will see how far I get.  It is 12:38 AM and just being honest I have presents to wrap, laundry to ignore and sleep to avoid.

Let’s start at the beginning.

Sunday 12/8 – 4 pm:  Mike and MJ decide to go outside and play basketball.  I wish I had taken a pic of them out there.  (Hmm, squirrel….shall I check Ring to see if a camera caught them….hold please….) (Please forgive this grainy pic but I zoomed in…)

Screenshot 2019-12-15 at 12.44.38 AM

Okay…I am also not sure if I have mentioned that my baby girl is following in the steps of her big brothers and is playing basketball.  It is middle school ball and it is a great opportunity for her to learn the fundamentals and to experience a TEAM and y’all it is the best group of girls.  All rooting each other on and they just seem so happy to see each other at the beginning of each game…as if they have not spent the morning together at school!  🙂 I am so happy for her!  Her coach is an AMAZING lady who loves the game and you can tell she genuinely loves these girls.  It has just been great for us.  SO – her Daddy was giving her some extra practice time, doing some drills with her and getting outside on a beautiful afternoon.  They enjoyed themselves so much!

Monday evening:  Mike gets home from work and is complaining about his shoulders and chest hurting.  We talk about it and both figure out that he likely overdid it the day before since he does NOT regularly play ball and use those muscles.  He takes some pain meds….goes to sleep….and I think all is well!

Tuesday evening:  Mike texts me in the evening to tell me he is not going to a work dinner that he had planned to attend.  He was trying to finish something up and would pick something up on the way home because he was not feeling well.

Tuesday night around 11:30 PM:  I felt SO stressed out. I can’t really explain it and if you have never had a panic or anxiety attack, it probably sounds silly….but I had this feeling of a weight on my chest and could NOT shake it. I felt “impending doom” and was just SURE I was having some kind of episode.  I had gotten out of bed because lying down seemed to make it worse.  My left arm hurt.  I was hot all over (and that is WEIRD for me!) and felt nauseated.  I got back in the bed around 12:30 and honestly I just wanted Mike to wake up and check on me…and he did.  When he heard how worried I was, instead of his usual “trying to fix things” or just being laid back and telling me it was all good….he said, “You want me to take you to the ER?”  With those words, I got up and got ready.  If HE thought it was that serious, well so did I!!

Wednesday morning around 12:15 am:  We get to the ER and there is NO one in the waiting room (yeah!!) and when I walk up and say “I’m having chest pains”…you can imagine the urgency that evokes.  It seemed like it was about 23 seconds before I was in an exam room and having leads stuck to me and an EKG being taken.  IV is inserted and blood taken and then they brought me 4 aspirin to take.  I am explaining my symptoms to every nurse, tech, dr, PA, visitor, and anyone else who will listen.  A short time passes and the ER Dr comes in to tell me that I am suffering an anxiety attack.  We talk about that for a minute…the fact that I take anxiety meds….that I  am really shocked that it’s “only” an anxiety attack and that I feel this sense of “impending doom” and he sends me home with orders to take some medication at home and get some rest.

We get home around 1:30 am and I do as I am told and then I went to sleep.  I can’t say that I really felt better when I went to sleep but knowing that I was physically or clinically “okay” and my heart was okay did help me to know that it was my anxiety and helped me to try to get some rest.

All this time, Mike is still hurting and sadly I do remember him sitting in the chair beside my ER bed and he was talking about his shoulders….and I seriously remember thinking……….”REALLY, CAN’T IT JUST BE ABOUT ME FOR A SECOND??”  Bahahahahahaaa….ohhhhhhhhhhhhhhhhh how funny that is today!!!

See you in the next edition because THIS story is far from over! 😉

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